QUESTION:
When I am trying to do my math homework and I get frustrated when I don't understand, I have negative thoughts like I can't do this or this is too hard and it makes me give up, and then I don't finish my homework. I want to get good grades so what can I do?
ANSWER:
We all have that annoying voice in our head sometimes that tells us things to stop us from succeeding especially when things feel hard. That is negative self-talk and if we don't believe we can do something we can choose to listen to that voice. When you listen to these negative thoughts it will demotivate you and stop you from having the patience to slow down and keep trying to understand and it makes you frustrated and anxious and lets you give up.
So what can we do?
We have to practice positive self-talk. It sounds like -"this is hard but I can do this", "I am smart and I can figure this out" or "I know if I take my time and don't get frustrated I can get the right answer".
Positive self-talk is very powerful and supportive and boosts your confidence and helps you succeed instead of giving up.
We can shut down negative self-talk by using positive statements or affirmations. Here's how:
1. Write a positive supportive statement - for example, " I am capable of getting a good grade in math" "When I slow down and take my time I can get good grades" " I feel great when I get my math homework done" "I can be successful".
2. Put it somewhere where you see it and read it every day to remind yourself how capable you are. Visualize in your head how it feels when you believe it. Say it out loud.
3. Even if you don't believe it at first, the more you read it the more you start to really believe it's the truth and the negative self-talk starts to become quieter and the positive voice becomes louder! You'll start to notice you stay calmer when you come up against something hard.
Anyone who uses positive statements to support themselves and finds it helpful I would love you to share how it's been helpful!
Here's a video by competitive figure skater Hannah Hultberg talking about her experience and the importance of positive self-talk.
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